Last Halloween a gang of local boys were very, very rude to me. I’m a very private person, I have a cat and I wear long tight black dresses. They called me a witch and the ringleader threw an egg at my window. I was extremely cross, I can tell you. So this year I set a trap. I bought fake cobwebs, a witches hat and thick-handled broomstick and I borrowed a vintage riding crop. When Peter arrived, trick or treating at my door, he had no idea what was in store for him. He was putty in my hands. I can be VERY authoritarian and before he knew what hit him he was bare-bottomed and bent over. THEN I hit him with the crop. MY, how he flinched as I tanned his arse. The thick handle of the broom was just the thing to blister his bottom as I thrashed him unmercifully. Now THAT was a witches spell! But did Peter get a trick or did he get a treat? You decide…